Inexplicable habits of my coworkers, part 14

The Vietnamese delegate, like many other Americans, buys a cup of coffee every morning to get him going. He is partial to McDonald’s McCafe mocha and iced coffees, but when time does not permit, he will show up with a small (12oz) insulated cup from the gas station. He does not actually drink this coffee on the way to work—he simply requires that someone find him a cupholder for it on the ride in. It is probably in the best interests of the upholstery that he does not attempt to drink while the vehicle is moving, given his lack of fine motor skills.

Several days ago, he came out to the car at the end of the work day, carrying his coffee cup from the morning (it should be noted that this is a cup from the gas station, which he replaces every day—he is not quite so unhinged that he has emotional attachment to disposable cups). Setting it on the roof of the PRL delegate’s car (does that not irritate anyone else but me?), he explained its continued presence at five in the evening: “I made another cup of coffee this morning, but I forgot about it. But I can’t drink now, because the caffeine will keep me up all night.” Which leads to the logical assumption that he is taking the coffee home, cold and 8 hours old at this point, with plans to drink it the next morning, as its age approaches a full 24 hours. Nothing gets you going in the morning like reheated backwashed coffee sludge.


It is more likely, however, that he will set the cup on his own roof as he struggles to maneuver his briefcase, man-purse, car keys and iphone so that they are all in the cabin of his car at the same time, with none of the attendant straps (or seatbelts) wrapped around his neck, while at the same time attempting to not close the door on his own legs, and in the process will forget the coffee remnants above him. He will then drive off, leaving a spray of java in his wake, leaving him free to purchase another cup of coffee the next morning.